Well the past few days have given me lots to chew on.
My original intention when I decided to stay home with my girls was to stay about a year. At the time I couldn't imagine leaving a newborn and 18 month old with anyone else, even if it was their Grandma.
If this were a perfect world, and I had married for money rather than love :), I would stay home a lot longer. But alas, it is not and seeing that my husband is a carpenter and business slows in the winter while heating bills rise and we continue to deal with a few bills that were established before we learned prudence, we find there is a need for me to work as I've watched what little savings we had, slowly depleting.
I've applied for several jobs. Many part-time, and only a few full time jobs. Part-time jobs in my line of work and for someone with my experience are not plentiful in my mid-size, mostly blue-collar, town. So I've had no luck. And besides, everyone knows that when you work out the numbers, unless you're practically paid in gold, they don't contribute to the family income as much as you would think they would.
So, I've prayed and prayed. Believing God is sovereign. Because, I said, if I have to go back to work full-time, then I want it to be in an organization that is making a positive impact, where there is a positive environment, where I will feel good about what I'm doing. So I asked God to guide all things in this process. If it wasn't going to be a place that was good for me, and if going to work wasn't going to be good for my family - in other words, God had a different plan and solution for our situation, I asked him to open and close doors as he willed.
So after a string of applications, mailing resumes and an interview here and there, last week I applied, was interviewed and was offered a job at a christian radio station. WOW! It was a whirlwind of a week.
Then on Saturday, pastor asked me if I would consider taking on the position of the Director of Women's Ministries for 2005. Whoa!
After basically taking off a year for some wonderful renewal - mentally, physically and spiritually (I had been the General Church Treasurer/Accountant for nine years prior to this year and had held other positions simultaneously as well), I find my plate filling up once more.
I haven't agreed to accept the position. My concern is that I don't want to short change my kids anymore than necessary. And yet... I have felt in the last few weeks, a bit idle. Oh be careful what you say!!
So there is my dilemma. It's one I can't mull over too long, an answer is needed ASAP.