Sometimes I wish I had a rewind button - a do it over button. There are moments here and there that I would love to erase and do over. Like when I raise my voice with my kids, or when I over-react over some new mini-crisis. Or when I react too quickly. I do that much too often.
But life is all about do overs and trying to get it right. When at first you don't succeed and all that. Some days are tougher than others to get back up after a fall, and start all over again. But thank God for new days, new years, and new starts.
I really have to learn how to shake off the dust and move forward. I need to embrace peace a little more. I need to learn how that "optimism" really works. I suspect my failure to do that thus far is what caused my recent trip to the emergency room. Costochondritis - strained ligaments in the chest wall. Not fun. And while the doctors say that it's an unexplainable condition, every bout of anxiety or moment of stress tells me with painful clarity that something more than ligaments are amiss in Ms. Me right now.
I'm attempting to read Purpose Driven Life straight through once again. But this time not on my own. Last time I got to chapter 19 and just stopped. I can't recall why exactly. This time there 's a whole group of us that are reading the book together, hubby included. We started off by reading the chapter outloud together. Nice start. I'm on track so far, but I'm knee deep in a Mitford book. I haven't read a fiction book in such a long while. It's a real treat.
Speaking of, hubby and I are in the midst of a wild book spree. Truly. It's too wild. Over the weekend we picked up a book each and we have 5 more coming in the mail !! We are out of control. But sooo loving our books right now. So many good books!
And the influence on the girlies is good too. Each evening when we read, girlies will go get a book each as well and page through their books. I love how Girlie 1 retells, in her own interpretation, the books we read together to Girlie 2. Note they are loving Dr. Seuss right now, and particularly Cat in the Hat (Thing 1 and Thing 2). Girlie 2 is talking so very much right now. I cannot believe she'll be two this month and suddenly after three and 1/2 years, we'll technically not have a baby in the house.
While I'm relieved at the notion, and the thought that soon both Girlies will be potty-trained, I can't help wondering now, does God have another baby in the brew for our lives?