Hello poor neglected little blog. I'm still here. So sorry I've left you all alone so long.
You see, we have this massive here and there dialogue that has consumed us. But you will be so happy to hear, or read, that we can see the light. It is definitely within reach, and it's a beautiful sight.
I've been meaning to tell you all about it. But I was at a loss for words. That's what being here and there does to you. You tend to lose your train of thought in mid-sentence.
But if you want a clue, take a look here, at Francis Chan explaining much better than I ever could, why he's walking away from something good, why he's leaving the comfortable and secure for a foggy future, full of risk, following only the voice of God into the unknown. Funny, I say "only" the voice of God as if that shouldn't be enough.
Sometimes something can be sad, heart-wrenching and difficult to reconcile, and also be equally exciting, promising and just GOOD. You can be absolutely sure of what you should do with doors flung open wide ahead of you, and still mourn for the closed doors behind. You can be fearless, and full of fear.
Chan articulates all of this, and though I wouldn't begin to compare our little world to his, it is completely parallel, and once again the echos of God's call in our ministry is all around us, and comes in the most unexpected places.
We're human. We're imperfect. And at the point where God can do something.
Thank you Lord.
Showing posts with label Hmm.. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hmm.. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Food
I know what you're thinking ...you're thinking I'm going to go into some extensive blog about the joys of holiday cookies, roasts, lasagnas...all that stuff I usually gush over this time of the year.
Not going to happen. This next week there will be some of that, its inevitable - for now. But I've had a bit of a revelation, if you will. As with all new things, I wasn't sure if it was going to stick. But it's been nearly 2 months - and it takes at least 21 days to change old habits, I think it's safe to share.
Reflecting on this past year - it's been a roller coaster. Health issues that were a domino effect of underlying problems - my physicians and I had to get through each side effect, before we could get to the root.
Well the root was no surprise - diabetes.
So diabetes is very prevalent in my family, and therefore my DNA. After 3 kids, gestational diabetes, and struggling with being overweight my entire adult life - it was only a matter of time.
And that's the saddest part, I think. I passively just waited for it to come. I thought I'd have until my 40's or 50's. So I was irrationally shocked when my body started going haywire this year. Too early. Way too early.
In October I received my diagnosis - after 10 months of - well a time I'd sooner leave behind me. And something went off in me. For the first time I couldn't accept this "fate" and I decided I had to do everything that I could to change - and trust in God for the rest.
So I logged onto sparkpeople.com and ran into some lovely people that introduced me to Eat to Live, and a journey of learning and changing began.
I heard about the Raw for 30 days documentary , and heard from doctors like this. And decided that I needed to eat a more vegetarian or even vegan diet.
I know this all sounds radical, and it is - I've been living it. But I decided that I have to at least try, right? So since early November, that's how I've been living. I may have a few ounces of the taboo foods here and there - my family still eats it, but I'd say 98% of the time, I'm on plan, feeling better each day and losing weight without feeling hungry or deprived! That alone would be worth it!
Oh but then I see this documentary,Food, Inc. that people are talking about - and OMW. It's not enough that I've taken on changing MY OWN habits, I have to make these changes for my kids too. What we called food 10-15 years ago, is not what is on the shelves now. So if I thought that I ate some questionable things as a kid - well I can't begin to say what we are feeding our children.
So this week, instead of buying the aisles and aisles of overindulgent, unhealthy, food that I would normally flock to in the name of the holidays each year. I'm learning what I need to do to get healthier, organic, nutrient-dense foods into my diet and my family's diet. So that history doesn't repeat itself, and to give the DNA I passed on to them, a fighting chance.
Happy holidays indeed.
It's definitely not going to be easy - but definitely worth it. So, if any of you know any sites or cookbooks or anything that would help to transition a family eating a very traditional American diet to a more wholesome plant based diet - please share, I'd love to hear from you.
Not going to happen. This next week there will be some of that, its inevitable - for now. But I've had a bit of a revelation, if you will. As with all new things, I wasn't sure if it was going to stick. But it's been nearly 2 months - and it takes at least 21 days to change old habits, I think it's safe to share.
Reflecting on this past year - it's been a roller coaster. Health issues that were a domino effect of underlying problems - my physicians and I had to get through each side effect, before we could get to the root.
Well the root was no surprise - diabetes.
So diabetes is very prevalent in my family, and therefore my DNA. After 3 kids, gestational diabetes, and struggling with being overweight my entire adult life - it was only a matter of time.
And that's the saddest part, I think. I passively just waited for it to come. I thought I'd have until my 40's or 50's. So I was irrationally shocked when my body started going haywire this year. Too early. Way too early.
In October I received my diagnosis - after 10 months of - well a time I'd sooner leave behind me. And something went off in me. For the first time I couldn't accept this "fate" and I decided I had to do everything that I could to change - and trust in God for the rest.
So I logged onto sparkpeople.com and ran into some lovely people that introduced me to Eat to Live, and a journey of learning and changing began.
I heard about the Raw for 30 days documentary , and heard from doctors like this. And decided that I needed to eat a more vegetarian or even vegan diet.
I know this all sounds radical, and it is - I've been living it. But I decided that I have to at least try, right? So since early November, that's how I've been living. I may have a few ounces of the taboo foods here and there - my family still eats it, but I'd say 98% of the time, I'm on plan, feeling better each day and losing weight without feeling hungry or deprived! That alone would be worth it!
Oh but then I see this documentary,Food, Inc. that people are talking about - and OMW. It's not enough that I've taken on changing MY OWN habits, I have to make these changes for my kids too. What we called food 10-15 years ago, is not what is on the shelves now. So if I thought that I ate some questionable things as a kid - well I can't begin to say what we are feeding our children.
So this week, instead of buying the aisles and aisles of overindulgent, unhealthy, food that I would normally flock to in the name of the holidays each year. I'm learning what I need to do to get healthier, organic, nutrient-dense foods into my diet and my family's diet. So that history doesn't repeat itself, and to give the DNA I passed on to them, a fighting chance.
Happy holidays indeed.
It's definitely not going to be easy - but definitely worth it. So, if any of you know any sites or cookbooks or anything that would help to transition a family eating a very traditional American diet to a more wholesome plant based diet - please share, I'd love to hear from you.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Whose report will you believe?
What is your response in uncertain times?
This entire Christmas season, the hope and joy of the birth of our Savior - all started with a response. When the angel of the Lord appeared to Mary and told her of this huge, unbelievable, awe-inspiring, scary, overwhelming part she could play in the greatest story to ever be told - she responded with "I am the Lord's servant...may it be to me as you have said."
Without that response, would it not have happened? Well, likely. But the fact is that this young, inexperienced, small town woman stepped up and said yes to something that was entirely bigger than herself. She agreed to something she did not wholly understand. She couldn't fathom HOW it would happen or how it could happen. In fact, it was highly probably that she would be misunderstood and ostracized for it. Yet despite all of the unknowns and risks ---she said yes.
That's huge.
Too often our response is more like Zacharias. Rewind from verse 38 of Luke 1 to verse 8, where Zacharias basically says - you expect me to believe this? To which the angel silences him by making him mute.
The life God has for us to live is so much greater than anything we can imagine ourselves. There is something inside each of us that desires a great faith adventure, to witness God working in our lives, in our families, our cities and country.
But unfortunately, with our own doubt and negative words our great stories end before they had a chance to start. We give our own fears and insecurities greater weight than the promises of God.
Has he not said to us that he has plans to prosper and not harm us, plans to give us hope and a future? Doesn't he tell us that he is the Lord, and he will go out before us, stay with us, not leave us or forsake us?
My God - who knew us before we were - says to us over and over in the scriptures: Do not fear. Don't be dismayed. Fear not! nor be afraid.
If you can't hold on to his promises - and his word is full of his promises for us - then at least follow this commandment. If you find fear has taken over you, if you feel dismayed because you thirst for something greater in your life, but you're drowning in doubt and insecurities, it's time to shut that fear down.
Nothing is impossible for God. That's a fact. Speak it. Go to the scriptures and his promises will reassure you - and give you new strength to go for it.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the holy spirit. Romans 15:13.
This entire Christmas season, the hope and joy of the birth of our Savior - all started with a response. When the angel of the Lord appeared to Mary and told her of this huge, unbelievable, awe-inspiring, scary, overwhelming part she could play in the greatest story to ever be told - she responded with "I am the Lord's servant...may it be to me as you have said."
Without that response, would it not have happened? Well, likely. But the fact is that this young, inexperienced, small town woman stepped up and said yes to something that was entirely bigger than herself. She agreed to something she did not wholly understand. She couldn't fathom HOW it would happen or how it could happen. In fact, it was highly probably that she would be misunderstood and ostracized for it. Yet despite all of the unknowns and risks ---she said yes.
That's huge.
Too often our response is more like Zacharias. Rewind from verse 38 of Luke 1 to verse 8, where Zacharias basically says - you expect me to believe this? To which the angel silences him by making him mute.
The life God has for us to live is so much greater than anything we can imagine ourselves. There is something inside each of us that desires a great faith adventure, to witness God working in our lives, in our families, our cities and country.
But unfortunately, with our own doubt and negative words our great stories end before they had a chance to start. We give our own fears and insecurities greater weight than the promises of God.
Has he not said to us that he has plans to prosper and not harm us, plans to give us hope and a future? Doesn't he tell us that he is the Lord, and he will go out before us, stay with us, not leave us or forsake us?
My God - who knew us before we were - says to us over and over in the scriptures: Do not fear. Don't be dismayed. Fear not! nor be afraid.
If you can't hold on to his promises - and his word is full of his promises for us - then at least follow this commandment. If you find fear has taken over you, if you feel dismayed because you thirst for something greater in your life, but you're drowning in doubt and insecurities, it's time to shut that fear down.
Nothing is impossible for God. That's a fact. Speak it. Go to the scriptures and his promises will reassure you - and give you new strength to go for it.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the holy spirit. Romans 15:13.
Sunday, August 09, 2009
Storms
Storms and I have had a fractured relationship.
My grandmother loved storms. When I was a kid and we'd hear a distant rumble, or hear the clouds open and heavy raindrops beat the ground, we'd run outside onto grandma's expanse covered front porch to witness the amazing show.
We'd cheer for the lightning displays, we'd dance when the thunder shook the windows and rumbled under our feet, and when it all wound down to a calm peaceful rhythm, we'd run out onto the sidewalk to wash in wonder in the cool soothing shower.
Since then, my childhood confidence and trust has waned. The safety of each day and the hope of my youth has fallen away. All grown up now with the cares and worries of a home, a family, loss, discouragement and difficulties have changed my perspective.
Now when it storms I find myself worried. I cower. I hardly dare approach any of the windows, afraid of the chaos brewing outside. Fearful of the power of the storm and it's destructive force.
I hide under my covers. I rush to check on my kids. I snuggle into the crook of my husbands shoulder. I've even been known to wake up my sleeping children and take them to the basement covered in their blankets to my own brand of safety.
Where did my awe and appreciation for storms go? When did I start to fear the storm rather than revel in its danger and power?
Last night we had a storm. And as has been my practice these past few years, I jumped up covered in my blanket to check on the kids and consider if we needed to move to safety. Satisfied, I went to cower next to my hubby in bed and found myself asking, why does there have to be storms? To which my husband replied - "Because God wants to show us what he can do" before he turned over and fell back asleep. And I felt the tears silently start to fall.
I love my husbands perspective. His optimism, and ability to see God's hand in even the toughest of times.
Even with our new excitement for the purpose God has in our lives, I have continued to struggle with my health and doubts. Irrationally? Unnecessarily? Perhaps. I've lost my awe and appreciation of the storm. The amazing story that is a difficult time in life. A trial per se, that only tells us the stunning and graceful truth that God is right with us through it all, that he is walking us through it - safely and faithfully.
I can watch the lightning and feel the thunder and the eminent danger that it all may seem, but still know that I will dance in the rain. God's hand is right there through it all, and I don't need to fear. I can trust that he is God, and he can still do the greatest of things - and he will restore me body and soul and this story will be to his glory.
My grandmother loved storms. When I was a kid and we'd hear a distant rumble, or hear the clouds open and heavy raindrops beat the ground, we'd run outside onto grandma's expanse covered front porch to witness the amazing show.
We'd cheer for the lightning displays, we'd dance when the thunder shook the windows and rumbled under our feet, and when it all wound down to a calm peaceful rhythm, we'd run out onto the sidewalk to wash in wonder in the cool soothing shower.
Since then, my childhood confidence and trust has waned. The safety of each day and the hope of my youth has fallen away. All grown up now with the cares and worries of a home, a family, loss, discouragement and difficulties have changed my perspective.
Now when it storms I find myself worried. I cower. I hardly dare approach any of the windows, afraid of the chaos brewing outside. Fearful of the power of the storm and it's destructive force.
I hide under my covers. I rush to check on my kids. I snuggle into the crook of my husbands shoulder. I've even been known to wake up my sleeping children and take them to the basement covered in their blankets to my own brand of safety.
Where did my awe and appreciation for storms go? When did I start to fear the storm rather than revel in its danger and power?
Last night we had a storm. And as has been my practice these past few years, I jumped up covered in my blanket to check on the kids and consider if we needed to move to safety. Satisfied, I went to cower next to my hubby in bed and found myself asking, why does there have to be storms? To which my husband replied - "Because God wants to show us what he can do" before he turned over and fell back asleep. And I felt the tears silently start to fall.
I love my husbands perspective. His optimism, and ability to see God's hand in even the toughest of times.
Even with our new excitement for the purpose God has in our lives, I have continued to struggle with my health and doubts. Irrationally? Unnecessarily? Perhaps. I've lost my awe and appreciation of the storm. The amazing story that is a difficult time in life. A trial per se, that only tells us the stunning and graceful truth that God is right with us through it all, that he is walking us through it - safely and faithfully.
I can watch the lightning and feel the thunder and the eminent danger that it all may seem, but still know that I will dance in the rain. God's hand is right there through it all, and I don't need to fear. I can trust that he is God, and he can still do the greatest of things - and he will restore me body and soul and this story will be to his glory.
Thursday, March 05, 2009
Wide world of prayer
Without going into too much, I work at a wonderful place that actually pays me to sit down and develop my faith alongside my co-workers.
We're currently discussing the importance of prayer in our faith walks. This of course is nothing new, but I was struck by a thought today as I was doing my reading for the discussion.
Prayer has no definition! Mind you - there are components and parts. But I cannot fit "PRAYER" into a box or an equation, into an hour or an explanation. No explanation would suffice to encompass the depth and breadth that is prayer.
So often we lament that we need to pray more, as if prayer doesn't naturally fit into our busy lives and schedules. But prayer is like the breath we take. We cannot live without it. We cannot be without it.
It's purpose is to bring us closer to God. It is being in and around God. It is to think, speak and feel God not only in the moments when we close our eyes, or hide away in our meditation corner or prayer closet. It is being in love with God. It is my heart bursting and yearning for more.
When our every thought, our every step, our every word is deliberately lived to get closer to Him, to know Him better, and to honor Him - without ceasing -there is prayer.
Ponder that.
And this: http://lotsofscotts.blogspot.com/2009/03/prayer-and-vows.html
We're currently discussing the importance of prayer in our faith walks. This of course is nothing new, but I was struck by a thought today as I was doing my reading for the discussion.
Prayer has no definition! Mind you - there are components and parts. But I cannot fit "PRAYER" into a box or an equation, into an hour or an explanation. No explanation would suffice to encompass the depth and breadth that is prayer.
So often we lament that we need to pray more, as if prayer doesn't naturally fit into our busy lives and schedules. But prayer is like the breath we take. We cannot live without it. We cannot be without it.
It's purpose is to bring us closer to God. It is being in and around God. It is to think, speak and feel God not only in the moments when we close our eyes, or hide away in our meditation corner or prayer closet. It is being in love with God. It is my heart bursting and yearning for more.
When our every thought, our every step, our every word is deliberately lived to get closer to Him, to know Him better, and to honor Him - without ceasing -there is prayer.
Ponder that.
And this: http://lotsofscotts.blogspot.com/2009/03/prayer-and-vows.html
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